Pipe down

Amongst excitement today that a helicopter landed at our training base in Benton, with the rest of the squad training at Carton House near Dublin, came news breaking from the Chronicle that United face a 'player revolt' if the management/ player embargo isn't lifted within two weeks. The playing squad have correctly identified the current situation as a farce, but the fact remains that they played a crucial part in their own downfall.

It is NOT the players that suffer here, it is the fans. It is the people for whom this very club exists. Expensive, well-run, professional fitness sessions in exchange for payment of thousands of pounds per week - that is what the playing squad are 'suffering' with at the moment. They aren't fighting for the club, for the fans, or for what they believe in, they are fighting for themselves, and probably a damn sight harder than they ever fought for the Premier League status of this club.

This is not to say that Ashley and his men can be excluded from the blame game, far from it. The players are right - the sale is going too slowly, the appointment of a manager has not happened quickly enough and the booting out of old rope needs to begin now. But the adjudacators here are us, the fans. The board has no right to argue, the players have no right argue - get out - the lot of you.

At least someone wants us?

That is the optimistic message that can be taken from the previous two days of Newcastle United non-mania. Two bidders have accepted the asking price of £100m, and while we still know absolutely nothing about anything, at least it seems a sale is now on the cards. Hopefully as soon as a takeover process begins, SOMEONE will appoint a manager. At the moment we are heading for a second successive relegation, no exaggeration intended.

As each day goes by, another player doesn't arrive and nobody leaves. Although thankfully, our supposed promotion rivals (supposed because it's debateable whether either team will challenge) Middlesbrough are making signings that make them look like they want to settle down in this league and become even more boring. Many will say that they'd give anything for us to be a bog standard boring Premiership team, but would they really? Surely as soon as this sickening situation is resolved, excitement will kick in. I quite fancy a shot at a league we can actually win. Looking at the other teams, its got the potential to be a cracking season - some big names down here these days, it could be fun? They might want to limit it to one season though, after all we've got the Champions League to qualify for. We are a very big club if you hadn't heard. Massive. Flop.

Shamrock Rovers should be an interesting game at the weekend. The team that plays surely will not be the team that plays at the Hawthorns in August. Will the line-up give any indication of who is staying or going? Surely they are all training together in Ireland now, giving it absolutely nothing? What a mess.

Xisco, £50,000 a week, I mean, 'omg wtf lol'?

No, no, no, no, no!

"If they don't and haven't got anyone else, then I'd love to return. My opportunity would be to support Mike and Derek.

I enjoyed my time up there and enjoyed the people. I thought I did very well when I was up there. I'm pretty sure the run we were having at that particular time would have seen us through, but that's too late now."

- Joe Kinnear

The most upsetting and ridiculous decision in recent NUFC managerial history (the appointment of Joe Kinnear) appears to have reared its ugly head once again. Surely they wouldn't do this to us again?

I say fear not. All eyes are on the appointment of Alan Shearer and if that were not to go ahead, I cannot see anyone daring to re-hire Joe Kinnear. Damien Duff commented that since the arrival of Shearer, the club has been run "like a proper football club" which in short means that under Kinnear it WAS NOT.

Unpopular with the media, the fans and the players - this will not happen. He may bloody well want the job but this is a just a desperate plea - not a sign of things to come.

G-Owen Up

Yesterday evening saw the emergence of reports that Michael Owen had secured a move to Manchester United, subject to stringent medical. I am a little surprised, not because of my own views, but because I thought the leading lights of the football world had given up on the ex-pacey striker. It seemed a given that Owen would not find himself a Premier League top four club, but instead he finds himself at one of the best in the world.

It's a bit of an old cliché to say that Michael Owen 'will always score goals when he's fit' but all clichés are born from something. I have maintained throughout his four years at Newcastle that if he can play - he should play - for both club and country. Owen has that extra touch of something special that identifies a player as world class, whether they are in-form or not. That is why he has secured a move to Manchester United.

Sam Allardyce, like many others, questioned the injury record of our former number 10. Many of us will say that he spent his time with us sat with the physio, which is fair enough. But to be honest, there aren't many players who have arrived in the last 5 years that haven't. A broken toe, a torn cruciate ligament and a double hernia, Michael Owen's fault? Absolutely not. As for the niggling muscle injuries - they have plagued nearly the whole squad for some time now. David Rozehnal had missed one game in two seasons before his transfer to Newcastle. Within three weeks of arriving, he had a groin injury. Yeah. And the 2005 training-pitch crisis anyone?

What I will say though, is that Michael Owen is not exempt from the pointed finger of relegation. He was capable of a lot more last season and his attitude was, as with many other players, disturbing. The club captain, the highest earner, Michael Owen 'the athlete; the ambassador; the icon' let us down and quality or not - get out - good riddance - you are not fit to wear the shirt.

Michael Owen brochure online here. Poor bloke - it's rubbish.

And so it begins...

It has actually become very difficult to write about Newcastle United. The problem is simple, we just don't know what is going on. Even rumour-fuelled discussion is fairly limited and where there are signals of things to come, they are completely mixed. Sometime last week, today was billed as potentially THE day that everything would become clear - a serious takeover proposal would emerge and Alan Shearer would retake his place in the hotseat. As it stands, the players, all of them (bar a couple of late internationals) return to the club for pre-season training today. A few seasons ago, the thought of some of those has-beens and useless tw*ts turning up for a day's work in the second division would have been laughable, but hopefully they have suitably lowered their self-opinion to fit a league that they thoroughly deserve to be in.

Many people will stand by their big, expensive names and blame the loss of Keegan and the loss of leadership through Hughton and Kinnear. Some people will even blame Alan Shearer. Some daring souls have heavily criticised the tactics employed by our old Number 9, writing them off as pragmatic failures. To be honest, at least he tried. No fit left-back? Play three at the back. It is basic stuff. Shearer and Dowie may not be master tacticians - but hell you would have thought that the third largest wage-budget in the world's top league could get you players that can pass to feet rather than out-of-play or perhaps even take a decent corner or freekick. Relegation was confirmed long before Shearer arrived on the scene.

Stan Collymore wrote the article "Why Newcastle will be relegated - and turn to Alan Shearer to get back up" for his football column in the Mirror at the beginning of March of this year.

"Newcastle have lurched from crisis to crisis this term, and have only won once in 12 games. Looking at their tough run-in of fixtures, they are going to go down without a shadow of a doubt."

"The first thing he (Ashley) will do is get rid of Joe Kinnear, Chris Hughton and Colin Calderwood - allowing Alan Shearer to ride to the rescue."

Not a bad guess (read the full article here). And so here we are on, in some respects, the first day of the new season and we're in a right old mess. I'm a little scared. Title-winning season, title-winning season...